Getting back to sleep

I’ve written previously about tips for setting yourself up for a good night’s sleep but I thought this time I’d have a look at a related topic: the dreaded waking up in the middle of the night.  If we wake up in the middle of the night worrying about something it can be upsetting and frustrating, but what can we do about it when it happens? How can we get settled and get back to sleep?

One of the most helpful things is keep a notepad by the bed and noting down, just quickly, what was worrying you.

We’re not looking to solve anything at the moment and we don’t need to keep it in our heads or thinking it through just now. We’ve got it on the paper and we know we’ll look at it later when we get up. Let’s focus on getting back to sleep.

Keep those lights off. Don’t be tempted to have a shower or check the phone for a bit of distraction. Another no no is going for a smoke or having a drink (hour of the wolf, be damned).

These are all things that will stimulate us, wake us up even more and make it harder for us to sleep. As much as possible we want to be reminding our bodies that everything’s fine and it’s safe to go back to sleep.

Avoid clock-watching. Time will take care of itself and it doesn’t need you to be checking on it. You can’t force yourself to fall asleep so checking up on how long it’s taking you to get to sleep is useless and just frustrating.

If we find it difficult to get back to sleep, we can get up, with the lights off, and move through into another room for 15-20 minutes and do something relaxing. Do a wee lap of the house in the dark.

If you have a housecat or a dog, it’s their bedtime too. Why not gently stroke them while they’re sleeping or, if they’re wondering what you’re doing up, give them a hug and some attention?

You can also a calming breathing exercise, or bodyscan. This is all about bringing us back into our bodies and what’s happening right now rather than letting our thoughts take us elsewhere or into 'what-if?'s and rumination.

We’ve captured the thing that was worrying us on the notepad. We’ll look at it later when we get up and it’s not something we need to be dealing with just now. As much as possible we want to be reassuring the body that it’s bedtime, we’re safe and it’s ok to rest.

If anxiety and worry is impacting your sleep and you'd like to talk to a mental health professional, drop me a message via the website or directly at mckellarcbt@gmail.com