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New Years Nerves (or The Whole World on Our Shoulders)

Looking ahead to a new year can be difficult. There are a lot of things on the horizon that might be filling us with dread and anxiety. When we look at the news right now in January 2025, there’s war, right wing politicians coming into power again, and the continuing climate crisis.


It’s perfectly normal to worry about these things, and worrying about them can be exhausting and make us feel overwhelmed. 


There’s a whole lot we can talk about in counselling when it comes to productive worry and unproductive worry, but for now I’d like us to appreciate what we can actually control vs what we can’t control.


No matter how stressed and upset we get ourselves, there’s ultimately nothing we can do to stop Donald Trump getting into power again. We cannot single-handedly stop the war in Ukraine or the terrible events in Gaza. We cannot make Andrew Tate a feminist through logic or common sense.


In essence,

  • We can’t control global events

  • We can’t control what other people think (even when that person on the internet is so very clearly wrong).


These are all external things, out of our control.


Ultimately what we do have control over is:

  • Our own boundaries (what we accept responsibility for)

  • Our thoughts and actions

  • The goals we set ourselves

  • How we speak to ourselves

  • What we give our energy to

  • How we respond to challenges


Consider the weather as one example. We can’t control the weather but we can control how we react to it so we can get on with things. Rainy day out there? Time for waterproofs. If it’s cold, we put on extra layers. If it’s sunny, we wear things that are light and comfortable.


We don’t give ourselves a hard time that it was raining at all. That would be ridiculous, right?


Going back to the original examples, we aren’t personally responsible for the return of President Trump or the continued conflicts in Ukraine and Gaza. These were happening anyway without us. However can accept that fact and still respond with positive action within the boundaries of what we do control.


Learning to accept what we can and can’t control and how we respond to big events can be a huge eye opener in counselling and an important step in managing anxiety and approaching the future.



If you would like to talk to me about problems with anxiety or other issues with your mental health, you can complete the online submission form or contact me directly at: mckellarCBT@gmail.com



Addendum:


Supporting charities is an excellent way of contributing to positive change. You might want to think about to donating to the following causes:



 
 

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