What we do and how we feel (or Beware the Blanket Fort)

The festive season can be full of anxiety and a time when we’re particularly rough on ourselves. Perhaps we think we should have achieved more over the year, maybe we’re lonely, or we miss someone who is no longer around.

It can be tempting to hide away, to pull the blanket over our heads and disengage with everything. Recharging isn’t in itself a bad thing, but be sure that’s what you’re doing.

The evolutionary logic behind avoidance is, basically, to hide away from danger in the belief that it will keep us safe. But this can also keep us from doing the things that we really enjoy and bring meaning to our lives. This can lead to a vicious cycle and depression, particularly if combined with unhelpful rumination.

What we do really does matter.

A fundamental part of CBT is understanding that what we think, what we do and how we feel are interconnected. If we want to feel differently we have to make changes to the others.

As part of treating depression in counselling we often encourage you to do things anyway rather than waiting for the motivation to do them, and just let the brain catch up with you. This “behavioural activation” can release endorphins which lift the mood, and give you more opportunities to have positive experiences. By taking action we’re giving ourselves the best chance of having positive experiences, even if we don’t feel like it at the time. I like to think of it as ultimately contributing to “more gas in the tank.”

This time of year can be a lot, but it can also be an opportunity to reconnect with what matters to us and heal. A season of possibilities for a brighter tomorrow.

If you would like help in addressing anxiety or depression, you can complete the online submission form or email me directly at: mckellarCBT@gmail.com